Hello, dear reader.

(Should I capitalize “dear reader”? That’s what I call you, whoever you are, so I guess it would be mechanically correct. But it seems strange to me to do that, so I won’t.  …This is one of many thoughts that interrupt my writing process. I need an editor.) 

It’s been a while. Not that I have a hefty amount of readers that miss me, but I know many of you have kept up with my blog. I can’t tell you how much I appreciate it. Not because I am looking to gain notoriety but the fact that so many of you care enough to take a few minutes out of your busy day to check in on how things are going. Whether I know you or not, thank you for reading. 

Well, the kids are gone. We are so thankful that we dropped them off to one of the best possible situations for them. Not something all foster parents can say. We are also so thankful that this family wants us to remain in their lives. Not something many foster parents can say.

We loved these children like they were our own, and like all parents, we had to let them go.

Yesterday, our last day, was a perfect day. We pretended it was Christmas, and the kids opened their presents. My family came over to celebrate with us. Then we got in the car and drove around looking at extravagantly decorated mansions while listening to Frank Sinatra and Bing Crosby Christmas music. It was perfect.

And now Michael and I sit in our empty house, except for our dog and conure (who makes more noise than all the kids combined). I could get incredibly emotional right now and allow myself to feel the pain of barrenness, but that’s a choice I don’t want to make right now. I’m choosing to focus on the positive once again: This wasn’t our final goodbye. We’ll have dinners with them. We’ll go to their birthday parties. We’ll carry them in our hearts forever. This isn’t goodbye. It’s a see you soon. And I couldn’t ask for anything better than that.